Thursday, May 24, 2007
Hmmmm idk what to title this lol
I don't know what to say really. I thought everything was going well with this possible job thing...... I got the interview and felt that it went well but they still haven't called me. Could be they found someone else. Then our tax refund came in too which would take care of all the problems that we were worried about when moving out there....... but maybe it's meant for something else. idk I mean yeah I'm sad if it didn't work out cause I know both me and my wife would have loved to go out there but if It's Gods will that we stay here then thats fine I guess. I'm just having a hard time with it I guess lol. I know God's smart and knows the best So i'm just trying to trust him and hope and pray that it's the best thing for us. I don't understand it but maybe sometime I will. Or maybe Im just going crazy lol and they will still call sometime. Who knows. I just pray that the best thing for us will happen. No matter what I want.
A song from the heart
And so it goes
In every heart there is a room
A sanctuary safe and strong
To heal the wounds from lovers past
Until a new one comes along
I spoke to you in cautious tones
You answered me with no pretense
And still I feel I said too much
My silence is my self defense
And every time I've held a rose
It seems I only felt the thorns
And so it goes, and so it goes
And so will you soon I suppose
But if my silence made you leave
Then that would be my worst mistake
So I will share this room with you
And you can have this heart to break
And this is why my eyes are closed
It's just as well for all I've seen
And so it goes, and so it goes
And you're the only one who knows
So I would choose to be with you
That's if the choice were mine to make
But you can make decisions too
And you can have this heart to break
And so it goes, and so it goes
And you're the only one who knows
For some reason this song touches me. It just reminds me that when you love someone, sometimes that will mean pain and hurt but yet at the end of the day to live without that love (even with the pain) it would indeed be the worst mistake. That even though I know I could be hurt or pained by my lover I still must give her all of my heart in trust because without that trust I know that I would soon lose that love which I hold so dear.
C.S. Lewis says it so well : "Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable."
I wish I had written this song. I'd dedicate it to my lovely wife. But even though I didn't I still feel this way about you baby. I would trade a life with no pain or hurt for one minute of your love. I'll let you in, I'll love you with all I am and have. I'll give you all of me and you can have this heart to break. I love you.
In every heart there is a room
A sanctuary safe and strong
To heal the wounds from lovers past
Until a new one comes along
I spoke to you in cautious tones
You answered me with no pretense
And still I feel I said too much
My silence is my self defense
And every time I've held a rose
It seems I only felt the thorns
And so it goes, and so it goes
And so will you soon I suppose
But if my silence made you leave
Then that would be my worst mistake
So I will share this room with you
And you can have this heart to break
And this is why my eyes are closed
It's just as well for all I've seen
And so it goes, and so it goes
And you're the only one who knows
So I would choose to be with you
That's if the choice were mine to make
But you can make decisions too
And you can have this heart to break
And so it goes, and so it goes
And you're the only one who knows
For some reason this song touches me. It just reminds me that when you love someone, sometimes that will mean pain and hurt but yet at the end of the day to live without that love (even with the pain) it would indeed be the worst mistake. That even though I know I could be hurt or pained by my lover I still must give her all of my heart in trust because without that trust I know that I would soon lose that love which I hold so dear.
C.S. Lewis says it so well : "Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable."
I wish I had written this song. I'd dedicate it to my lovely wife. But even though I didn't I still feel this way about you baby. I would trade a life with no pain or hurt for one minute of your love. I'll let you in, I'll love you with all I am and have. I'll give you all of me and you can have this heart to break. I love you.
Thursday, May 17, 2007
Corporate Christianity Poop
I don't know just seems to me that corporate Christianity is a problem. It's packaged up into a pretty little gift box and handed to kids from parents who pay way too much $$ and way too little attention to the messages that are being sent out..... Let me try to explain......
Ok I'm a 3d artist working in a company that is producing some Christian shows for kids. And one of the shows is all about how if you pray hard enough God will give you whatever you ask for..... I mean it does have some good stuff in it or whatever but there is a huge over tone of you ask hard enough you get it. the title of the show is even called "Push" as in pushing God to answer you the way you want. Maybe it's just cause of the situation I'm in currently but I know quite well from first hand experience that sometimes no matter how hard you pray you still don't get what you want... You may get what you need and what's best for you but not always what you want. And i just think that companies should be more careful when putting out messages about Christianity and make sure that they don't set kids up for disappointments when they don't get everything they want.
*getting off soap box*
Ok I'm a 3d artist working in a company that is producing some Christian shows for kids. And one of the shows is all about how if you pray hard enough God will give you whatever you ask for..... I mean it does have some good stuff in it or whatever but there is a huge over tone of you ask hard enough you get it. the title of the show is even called "Push" as in pushing God to answer you the way you want. Maybe it's just cause of the situation I'm in currently but I know quite well from first hand experience that sometimes no matter how hard you pray you still don't get what you want... You may get what you need and what's best for you but not always what you want. And i just think that companies should be more careful when putting out messages about Christianity and make sure that they don't set kids up for disappointments when they don't get everything they want.
*getting off soap box*
Monday, May 7, 2007
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